This is about you

I saw you from across the room, in your black three piece suit. You look "dapper", to say the least, it's as if you haven't aged a bit. 

I know you saw me. I know you did. You tried to pretend not to as I averted my gaze from you. But you saw me. You saw me and I saw you. 

For a moment, just a split second, I let myself wonder what it would be like if we had fought harder, held on longer.. But I knew she was close, she was almost always close. She never, maybe rarely, leaves your side. So I brushed the thought away, as quickly as she appeared next to you. 

I smile at the thought of what could have been but I'm grateful more for what isn't. I don't know if you would've been different if it was us, if I would let you be what you are now, what you were that night. 

Regardless, this is us. That is you with her and this is my life. You looked and so did I. For a moment the past was alive. And in a second, before it's too late, we I chose the present, me without you.. Me never being with you. 

It's not as sad as it sounds (reads). A post can only say so much. To go on how life has led us to different paths or made us different people would ruin the moment I'm trying to describe, when our eyes met and we knew what we had, acknowledge what we now have, accepted what we will never become.